30 : realisation

Suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, ‘Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?’

— Acts 9:3-4

There are moments in life when everything changes in an instant. Paul’s (formerly Saul’s) conversion is one of the most dramatic stories of transformation in the Bible. He was a man of certainty, rooted in his beliefs, actively persecuting those who did not conform. Yet, in a single moment of blinding revelation, his world shattered. The very thing he was fighting against became the path he was called to walk.

Caravaggio’s The Conversion of Saint Paul captures this moment with stunning contrast — Paul thrown from his horse, arms raised in shock, overwhelmed by the unseen presence. This is not just about religious conversion; it is a psychological and spiritual awakening. Jung might describe this as an encounter with the Self — the moment when the ego is confronted by a force greater than itself, leading to a radical reorientation.

In many ways, Paul's experience mirrors our own moments of profound realization. Sometimes, it takes a great disruption — an unexpected event, a loss, a challenge — to shake us awake. We resist, thinking we are in control, only to find that life has other plans. Jung speaks of individuation as the process of becoming our true self, and often, this journey begins when we least expect it.

Paul’s blindness in the aftermath of his vision is symbolic. Transformation requires us to sit in darkness for a time, to unlearn before we can see again. It asks us to trust the process, even when we feel lost. What we once believed may no longer serve us. But if we surrender to the unfolding path, we might discover something greater—our deeper purpose.

Journaling Prompt: Think of a time when your perspective shifted drastically—whether through a personal crisis, a moment of deep insight, or an unexpected experience. What beliefs did you have to let go of? How did that transformation shape who you are today?

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